Quotes by
Lenny Bruce |
1925-1966 , American comedian

17 quotes | 2,642 visits |
Quotations
• | Life is a four letter word. 5 |
• | The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds. 5 |
• | If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer. |
• | There are never enough “I love you’s”. |
• | Every day people are straying away from the church and going back to God. |
• | If you can't say “Fuck you” can't say, “Fuck the government”. |
• | Liberals can understand everything but people who don't understand them. |
• | If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish. |
• | The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an hour, they'll take you away, man. You can't |
• | The whole motivation for any performer is “Look at me, Ma”. |
Funny Quotes
• | I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write essays like “What I'm Going to be If I Grow Up”. 5 |
• | My mother-in-law broke up my marriage. My wife came home from work one day and found me in bed with her. 4 |
• | Miami Beach is where neon goes to die. |
• | If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses. |
• | Children ought to watch pornographic movies: it's healthier than learning about sex from Hollywood. |
• | Alright, let’s admit it, we Jews killed Christ – but it was only for three days. |
• | Faith is to the human what sand is to the ostrich. |