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The Best Quotations

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Quotes by

Kurt Vonnegut

1922-2007 ,  American writer
Kurt VonnegutAmerican writer noted for his wryly satirical novels who frequently used postmodern techniques as well as elements of fantasy and science fiction to highlight the horrors and ironies of 20th-century civilization.
Vonnegut published 14 novels, 3 short story collections, 5 plays, and 5 works of non-fiction. He is most famous for his darkly satirical, best-selling novel Slaughterhouse-Five (1969).

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Quotations

Dear future generations: Please accept our apologies. We were rolling drunk on petroleum.

The only difference between Hitler and Bush is that Hitler was elected.

We could have saved the Earth but we were too damned cheap.

Human beings are chimpanzees who get crazy drunk on power.

True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.

Science is magic that works.

Another flaw in the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.

The universe is a big place, perhaps the biggest.

In case you haven’t noticed, we are now almost as feared and hated all over the world as the Nazis were.

I was a victim of a series of accidents, as are we all.

The best jokes are dangerous, and dangerous because they are in some way truthful.

High school is closer to the core of the American experience than anything else I can think of.

We are what we pretend to be, so we must be careful about what we pretend to be.

Just because some of us can read and write and do a little math, that doesn't mean we deserve to conquer the Universe.

War is now a form of TV entertainment, and what made the First World War so particularly entertaining were two American inventions, barbed wire and the machine gun.

Shrapnel was invented by an Englishman of the same name. Don't you wish you could have something named after you?

Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment. There is no why.

Like so many Americans, she was trying to construct a life that made sense from things she found in gift shops.

We're terrible animals. I think that the Earth's immune system is trying to get rid of us, as well it should.

Funny Quotes

I tell you, we are here on Earth to fart around, and don't let anybody tell you different.

"To be is to do" - Socrates
"To do is to be" - Sartre
"Do Be Do Be Do" - Sinatra


One of the few good things about modern times: If you die horribly on television, you will not have died in vain. You will have entertained us.


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